A letter from Postojna

I came to Slovenia almost five years ago. I asked for asylum. I did not get it. Because I am from Afghanistan. Now it is already the second time that I am in Postojna in the Center for Aliens. They want to deport me. Today in the morning an inspector came in the room and said: “I do not care if you are a good man or not. If you do good or not. We get money from the European union so we will deport you.” Of course you get the money, I know.

But listen to my story, I will tell you what needs to be told. I tell you – even if I die in the Centre for Aliens I will not sign the papers to be voluntarily returned to Afghanistan. Slovenians do not know what it means to be a refugee. Jesus was a refugee. I am Noor, also a refugee. Do not worry, when I die I just ask for my body to be thrown into the sea.

Slovenian state has no empathy for people from Afghanistan, why? There is war in Afghanistan. I cannot even remember there ever beening no war. Not since I am alive at least. Yet for Slovenia, everyone who flees war is a criminal. All are treated the same, no matter if one is a hardworking honest person or dishonest one we are all seen the same. I do not understand why they cannot understand that I am just a man who wants to work and live a normal life. I thought that one day all would be fine and they would see that I want no harm and wish only to live. That was why, after the negative, I did not run away but waited. Every day I reported to the police, did everything as I was told. And yet I finish here, again locked up in Postojna. I am not even allowed to marry my girlfriend. What joke is this?
Sometimes I think about Afghanistan. About Talibs. Slovenian Ministry for Interior acts just like Talibs. Only that Talibs kill you at once, while the Ministry for Interior kills you slowly, day after day. My inspector David Natlačen only looks at papers. I have lost one life because of some silly papers. Where are the European Court and Ombudsman when you need them? Also they look only at papers.

I am not as crazy as you think. I hurt – this is no game. They play with lives. But let us go on, let us see who wins if we are to play. Now nothing hurts because I know the whole Slovenia is with me. And in the meantime I will study some more Slovenian – it is no easy language.

Noor, Afghanistan